Two Month Post Op Update

My gastric bypass surgery seems like the distant past.  Hard to believe it's only been two months....and what a couple of months it's been?!

I've dropped another 2 lbs. since my 10-16 update for a total of 10 lbs down since my one month post op and an overall weight loss of 46 pounds.

I'm down a total of three pants sizes and down one (almost two) shirt sizes.  Bras are a funny subject.  My boobs are definitely shrinking.  But my band size is shrinking faster than my cup size.  I no longer fill my old DD cups.  Instead, I look like a pre-teen who has been "stuffing" for years!!!  Yet I seem to spill out of my D's.  Either way, I look like a misfit who doesn't know how to buy a good bra!!!  I can't wait till the day I can go get fitted and have good bras that hold my boobs up where they should be.  For now, I'm getting $16 cheapies to carry me through the transition periods.

And, all of a sudden I'm buying "petite" length jeans.  Either I'm shrinking or they are changing the inseams in the industry.

I have been buying some new clothes to carry me through the seasons and body changes.  I'm trying not to stock up too much.  Yet I'm also trying to be sure I have enough to get me through trips, going out, etc.  It's a fine line.  Yesterday I hit TJ Maxx and hit the motherlode on discount Michael Kors sweaters and cardigans for the fall/winter.  Bargain shopping is a necessity.

Once upon a time, when I hit 40 and was still single, I bought myself a gorgeous diamond ring and setting.  I now wear it on my right hand.  It has a lot of sentimental value to me and symbolizes my independence and proof that I can survive on my own (if I had to).  That ring now rotates in circles around my finger....too big.  Maybe someday I'll get it re sized.  I'll continue wearing it until it literally falls off.  Then it will be stored for resizing once my weight loss has stabilized.  The ring on my left hand is similar, only less loose at this time, thank goodness.

Above Pic:  Before Surgery (left) and 2 mo post op pic (right)

Above Pic:  One mo. post op (left), 2 mo post op (right)

Because this "journey" is much more than physical, I try to share some of the mental challenges, as well.

I'm STILL trying to wrap my head around the mind vs. stomach battle.  My MIND wants to fill my plate or order generous portions when out.  My stomach is clearly not having that.  I ALWAYS have leftovers to take home or to package up at home.  ALWAYS!  I don't like to eat just ONE thing at a meal.  Sampler platters at restaurants are ideal for me.  Then I can have a taste of multiple things, at least.  Often times my leftovers end up going to waste.  I eat on them twice but never seem to want it four meals in a row!!!

Some days I have no appetite, whatsoever!  On the days I do feel "hungry", I eat; but find myself FULL very quickly.  Enjoying a meal is a rare treat!  My go to breakfast (and sometimes lunch) is peanut butter on a toasted English muffin, or a toasted thin bagel or just plain toast!  I usually have half a slice and I'm good!

Let's talk cravings.  So far I've been doing well with water and iced tea....no carbonated beverages.  On rare occasions, I crave a soda.  Last night, I turned to my husband and asked him if he thought it would be the kiss of death if I had one.  He promptly blurted, "YES!".  So I went back to water.  It's good for me to have someone to keep me honest with myself.  Accountability is important.  Every once in a while I still crave a soda.  But the reality is, I'm still MORE afraid to ruin my overall plan or goal.  So it takes over any craving I have.  I hope that will continue to be the case.

Speaking of cravings, I STILL have all the crazy sugar free snacks and treats that I was SURE I'd be craving all the time.  But the interesting thing is, even though I THINK I want them, I take a bite and either feel full or unsatisfied; so I end up abandoning the snack altogether.  My mind is still blown away by this; and I wish it wouldn't even trick me into thinking these things sound good at those times.  Because it ends up being a huge waste of time and money.  Not to mention, it often leaves my stomach feeling blah!

Instead, I've found myself enjoying hard candy for the first time in my life.  My go to treat is now a sugar-free caramel coffee Werther's.  Whodathunkit?!

Remember how I was curious to know what would happen if I had alcohol in small quantities?  Well last weekend on our annual anniversary trip to Grafton, IL, I had some wine for the first time since surgery.  We went over to Aerie's Winery.  Kevin bought a bottle of "Sandy's Candy" sweet red wine.  Mmmmm.  I followed the doctor's advice and started with a very small amount in my glass and sipped.  So far, so good.  I had a second "glass",....if I had to guess I'd say each was between 1/4 and 1/2 cup.  I would have had more except the bottle was gone, LOL.  I didn't feel tipsy at all.  No sugar reactions, nothing........just a thirst for more.  Mmmmm.  WHY didn't we buy a bottle to take home?!

And while we're on the subject of alcohol.  Kevin and I went out to Red Lobster Monday night for dinner.  I decided to "celebrate" by ordering my favorite frozen drink, a Mudslide.  I have mixed feelings about whether that was a good idea or not.  It was literally a taste of heaven.  Kevin watched my reaction as I drank it and laughed at me.  You'd think I was having an orgasm?!  I had MAYBE 1/4 of it and then got miserably FULL.  The rest went to waste.  I hated to waste such an expensive drink.  So now I'm left wondering if the cost was worth the heaven I tasted in that little quantity?!  Not sure.  Again, no tipsy feeling or anything like that.  Just a stomach that was like, "What they hell were you thinking?!"  I was thinking of immediate gratification, that's what!!!

I stand by a comment in one of my previous comments in this blog, that my weight loss has had a direct impact on my happiness.  I always thought I was a pretty happy person, in general.  But I've noticed I am happier and enjoy being "me" more now.  I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I have lost a little weight to where I can live with myself now versus that feeling of being defeated (by the excess weight) before.  Again, not sure.  I'm still processing a lot of this.

I can tell you that nothing feels greater than having your friends hug you and tell you how proud or happy they are for you.  Or a compliment like, "You look great".  It's AMAZING what it does for the soul.  Just knowing you are doing something to save yourself is empowering over that former defeatist mentality.

One of the biggest perks of the weight loss I've had so far is that I find I'm not getting winded or out of breath near as easily as I used to.  I can walk farther now.  Parking at a hockey game and walking to the stadium is not out of the realm of possibilities now.  Just a very liberating feeling.  Like I'm getting my life back, one pound at a time.

And lastly, for the first time in like 3 years, I set up an appointment to have our family portraits taken.  I've avoided it like the plague because I hated how I looked.  Now I can live with who I am on the outside 'cos I know it's a work in progress and WILL get better.

Thank you, again, for all the words of encouragement.  For the compliments on my blog and for your friendship.  Words cannot express how far that goes in motivating me to continue on said journey.

God Bless.

Lori